how does it feel to find yourself playin for the wrong team with the stakes so high

I've been without internet access since Thursday. It's Saturday morning and I just got it back. Whenever my internet access is curtailed I remember a few things about it. I remember how integral it is to my daily routine. The first thing I do every morning when I get up is turn on the computer - even on the way to the bathroom. Just pop it on so I can come on and check my mail. It's also the first thing I do whenever I come home at night. It helps me feel connected to everything else. Sometimes I sit down in my room at two a.m., flick on my computer, and sit there thinking about how cool it is. Sure, my monitor blows, but that's not the point. Somehow this little glowy, whiny box connects me in my little room in Newark California to the rest of the world. And there I nights where I can just feel that. I like it.

So without my internet connection I felt a little disconnected from everything else. It did help me get productive though. Without the internet to distract me I read a big part of Genesis. You know, the first book in the Bible. I read from Adam and Eve up through Abram getting his name changed to Abraham. I just absolutely love reading these stories about people in the Bible and you totally see them acting like...I dunno...PEOPLE. For example...Abram and Sarai laughing at God when He told them they would have a child even though Sarai was past childbearing age. Or Sarai letting Abram sleep with her maid, Hagar, so he could have a kid with her. Then, the minute Hagar gets pregnant Sarai starts hating her guts and making her life miserable and Hagar ended up running away. That just seems to real to me. She got jealous and started being a punk to Hagar even though she originally created the situation with good intentions.

Then of course there are the displays of inhuman courage. Such as Abram making the circumcision covenant with God - wherein all the men in his household (group) had to be circumcised and therefore God would bless them. This tradition has been carried on in the West for thousands of years and it started right there with Abram. Now, Abram (now called Abraham because of the covenant) was a fully-grown adult and so were many of the men in his house. But they didn't ask for exceptions from the circumcision rule. So I'm of the opinion that Abraham's most courageous act of faith was having himself and his men circumcised when they were full grown. Aside from the personal pain...do you want a way to foment rebellion in your servants?

"Hey, come here Eli."

"Yes, Abram?"

"It's AbraHAM now."

"Cool. How'd you get that name?"

"Well, that's why I called you over here. How do you feel about large knives, Eli?"